Rejuvenation

I want to declutter my life
clean up and clear out
the spaces
in my heart and mind
of faces and events
of loves and hates
of anger and frustration
of chaos and confusion.
I want to switch off the noise
reverberating inside my head.
Noise - that is drowning
the sound of music
I'm yearning to hear.
Then I shall be in sync -
beating to Your rhythm.

I want my solace from You
My advice from You
My joy from You
And My grief from You (in separation)
I want You to be my aim in life
You - my Journey
You - my Destination.
Only then will my life be worth having lived.

Ambitious??? Daring????
A sinner like me -
Twisted, corrupted,
and distorted ?
Yes. I dare to dream.

I am willing and ready
to be repaired and reconstructed.

Pain??? Suffering????
Yes again. After all, it’s my rejuvenation.

The Betrayal

I stand exposed
- in the public eye -
for everyone to see
and slander.
Betrayed.
I trusted the eyes
that looked at me -
and mistook hate
for anger.
I trusted the hand
that thrust
A knife in my gut -
As I'd trust
my own hand.

Perhaps, blood is not thick enough.

The thinker speaks:Even the bravest of us cannot claim that he fears nothing in this world. However, if we chose to fear The Greatest, then no fear in this world could terrify us.

Full Circle

It is full circle –
The past has come back -
to haunt the present.......
Justice must be done
Accounts must be settled.
Everyone must pay the price –
be it bitter or sweet –
For past deeds.
No act is lost, you see
And now -
It has returned –
to rankle.

If you are wise
You will see:
it is an opportunity
To right the wrongs.
Recognise:
IT’S TIME FOR RESTITUTION.

This is the chance:
You must make up for your sins –
the most abhorrent of all –
sins against mankind –
Sins for which there is no redemption.

It’s time to delve deep
into memories folded and hidden
in the recesses of your mind.
Cut open the wounds in your heart -
that had healed (with time)
Let the blood squeeze out once more
And relive
the pain of the past.
Pluck out archives of words and actions
Lay them all out on the table –
(it’s a sorting game)
And set them right ........
If you dare.

never immunised

Everyone to his own
pain. I to mine.
generations live
and die -
no life is free
of trials. Perpetual.
Yet, we forget
-and hurt anew
at every new test.
I should think
we'd be indifferent
to suffering. Immunised.
But no jab works twice.
Every trouble
- a new strain of virus
needs new strains
of immunisers.
And the suffering
must go on;
living till time lives.

The Salvaging

I gather now, the fragments
of our relationship
scattered on the ground.
The storm has moved on
leaving behind a fretful calm
that says:
there will never be peace again.

Weather beaten, windblown
I wander -
picking random pieces
of love and laughter.
anger and frustration
despair and disappointment.

Weak and vulnerable
I lift me and gather me
to myself.
Shattered remnant of
fragile emotional outbursts
grate under my feet.
I gather them too -
lacing them together
into a semblance of order.

I'm recovering.

Each breath, a celebration
of Your Mercy
Each heart beat, a tasbeeh
in Your Praise
The surging red streams, a tawaf
of the Kaaba of my heart
- purified -
so You may reside.