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Monday 23 August 2010

Remorse

The fiery flames of remorse -
More devastating than a flaming inferno
Burn with invisible heat that destroys -
But there are no ashes.
There is no burning out
No regeneration
No cleansing -
Just persistent, continuous eating away of the heart
Deathless, endless, perpetual.

The throbbing sting of
A scorpion or a snake -
Remorse is the poison that does not kill
Yet never eases, never heals.
Time sometimes, and sometimes our aging mind
Casts a curtain – and we take respite
As events, incidents, actions
Are buried in the folds of our brain.

What of the time then,
When there is no mind to hide the truth?
There is the self –
Faced with the open book of life before it -
Playing like a soap -
Only this time it is the story of life:
Your gadget set on continuous play.
The remote is not in your hands (there are no hands!)
You cannot ‘pause’...... or ‘forward’
(it ‘auto rewinds’ though, when it hurts most....).
Scene by scene, detail by detail,
Your life unfolds before your eyes –
Eyes that will not close at you will (there are no lids!)
Lost words and voices echo around your head -
You cannot close your ears (there are no ears!)
You stand up to run away from it all –
You can’t. (there are no feet!)
There is no escape. You are alone -
With just one soul mate - regret.
Your everlasting companion.
This is your hell – the promised Barzaq and Jahannam
Produced, directed and acted out by you, you alone.